Threshholds of Conversion: "Can I Trust You?"



 

 

Catechesis, which is supposed to be the teaching and maturing stage of evangelization, doesn't make a lot of sense if a person does not know who they are learning about and have a basic sense of trust. Trust can be "a positive association with Jesus Christ, the Church, a Christian believer, or something identifiably Christian." Trust is a bridge which allows a person to continue on their journey to an intentional relationship with Christ. If that bridge of trust does not exist, the journey will not go very far, so our first job is to help build it.  

Building trust and building a relationship often go hand in hand, particularly when trust has been violated, such as in the sex-abuse scandal, or if a child or adult and their family has been turned away from a church or program because of their special needs.  Often it is a person living their life in integrity, compassion, warmth and joy, who becomes a doorway through which others can begin to establish trust again.  This takes time, and to do it we have to (as Pope Francis says) take on the "smell of the sheep" and get a little dirty.  This means getting to know the person, listening, gaining knowledge and understanding of their joys and struggles, and as much as possible being present for both with that integrity, compassion, warmth and joy.  If this sounds daunting, remember this is not just a task for one person.  Anyone can be this "doorway" for another, and we are each attracted to different things, different people.      

In a classroom setting what this looks like is a teacher modeling love and respect for each student at all times including addressing students by name, and modeling respectful language, tone and volume- also by addressing disrespectful behavior firmly.  If this is done in a particular way when others are around, this example can end up reaching parishioners more generally. 

A beautiful, orderly atmosphere of gentle calm and quiet creates a sense of safety, and a sense of safety builds a sense of trust- trust in the teacher, but also a realization that he or she can trust God.  What we are saying about dignity, and how a person is loved by God is much more effective if we are giving the example first of how we treat them.  I am speaking from a 'classroom' perspective, but it should be noted that children begin to build 'models' of security and trust long before they reach any classroom, which is why an intentional example at home is so vital.   

A few years ago, I visited the kindergarten classroom of a master teacher.  I was struck by the natural peace and order I saw in this classroom and in the interactions.  When I asked her, she told me something I've never forgotten- "forming a classroom is like giving birth"- the process can be long and painful, but the result is beautiful and priceless.  The same is true for building trust, and relationships.    

Disposition and the Sacraments...

 

 It's always a little scary, talking about intention, disposition and receiving the Sacraments.  Yet, it is a fairly frequent question that comes up when a person with special needs wishes to receive the sacraments, and particularly when it is a person who has a developmental or mental disability.  But, it is a good question- how do we know if a child or adult who in some instances cannot communicate their intention and understanding outwardly, can validly and fruitfully receive the sacraments?  The first and shortest answer is, disability in and of itself is never a reason to delay or deny a sacrament.  I'll be sticking mostly with the Bishops on this one, but will be adding some commentary along the way, and I'll include a link to the full guidelines at the end.

Sherry Weddell describes a "positive disposition" as when a person embraces "both the sacramental sign, and the inward reality."  A sense of the sacred, and a "positive disposition" can be found in surprising places.  There is a friend in one of the SPRED groups who is known to close his eyes and raise his hands in prayer while the Scripture passage is being read.  He was also the one to express that though he was frustrated at the loss of some of his freedom when he was hit by a car (for the second time) he sees God working in his life, giving him opportunities to grow and renew himself. That is a kind of trust and hope that I can look to as an example. 

A "positive disposition" can look different from person to person, particularly when it comes to those with special needs. For example, some people indicate the difference between the Eucharist and ordinary food by matching pictures, or by sign language.  Others simply by a quiet, reverent manner, or gesture.  In fact, part of the reason the age for receiving Holy Communion was lowered was because of a little girl, 4 years old, who recognized in the Eucharist her beloved "Holy God," and expressed reverence, as well as a firm desire to receive Him.  This is what is asked of all people who wish to receive Holy Communion.     

Baptism is probably the most straight-forward.  Basically if a person freely asks for it, is properly disposed, and is not legally prohibited, the only reason the Bishops give to defer is if "there is no reason for hoping that the person will be brought up in the Catholic religion".  Further,  "Disability itself is never a reason for deferring baptism.  Persons who lack the use of reason are to be baptized provided at least one parent or guardian consents to it" (page 8-9). 

This is what the bishops tell us about Confirmation: "All baptised, unconfirmed Catholics who possess the use of reason may receive the sacrament of Confirmation if they are suitably instructed, properly disposed, and able to renew their baptismal promises."  This, and also if a person to be baptized is of a teachable age, is where developmentally appropriate catechesis, and adaptation comes in, and there are several choices as far a programs that can be used as well.

 



There is even provision for if a person will never attain the use of their reason "Persons who because of developmental or mental disabilities may never attain the use of reason are to be encouraged either directly or, if necessary, through their parents to receive the sacrament of Confirmation at the appropriate time" (pg 11) [emphasis added].  One of the most joyous confirmation Masses I ever attended was that of a young man with Down Syndrome.  He was so quiet during the rite, and then finally afterward he just couldn't contain it anymore, and gave a huge smile, and a cheer.

When it comes to reconciliation, obviously to commit a serious or mortal sin, a person must have use of his or her reason.  That said, even young children, and people with mental disabilities are often aware of doing things they know to be wrong, and experience a sense of guilt and sorrow.  The bishops tell us "as long as the individual is capable of having some sense of contrition for having committed sin, even if he or she cannot describe the sin precisely in words, the person may receive sacramental absolution." And further, "those with profound mental disabilities, who cannot experience even minimal contrition, may be invited to participate in penitential services with the rest of the community to the extent of their ability."

It is not my intention to address all the sacraments here, but more to illustrate the different forms that "positive disposition" and "intention" can take, and how the sacraments can be supported for those who have special needs.  For more comprehensive information, I encourage you to check out the USCCB guidelines. 

Guidelines for the Celebration of the Sacraments with Persons with Disabilities

"The Fruit of Discipleship"

"Indeed, God with his call reaches the call of each individual, and the Spirit, who abides deep within each disciple (cf. 1Jn 3:24), gives himself to each Christian with different charisms and special signs.  Each one, therefore, must be helped to embrace the gifts entrusted to him as a completely unique person, and to hear the words which the Spirit of God personally addresses to him."

- Pastores Dabo Vobis

Today I just want to reflect a little on discerning charisms.  Truthfully, I have never participated in a "Called and Gifted" workshop- though I would be interested to.  What I know of my own gifts came mostly as a result of, well, listening.

When I was younger, occasionally I would watch my brother and two of my cousins who were about his age.  I liked to play school, to organize scavenger hunts for them, to give them ideas.  OK, I was also bossy.  As a young teenager I heard several times different variations of "you would make a good teacher." I was receptive to this idea because I loved, and had a great deal of respect for the teachers I had.  Sure enough, it came time for college, and no surprise, I signed up as an education major.  What was a surprise is that over the next three years, I discovered something- I was not terribly interested in my education classes, and as a result my grades were... less than stellar. 

At that point a good friend suggested something: why not try religious education?  Though I never would have thought of it, there was an instant 'click,' of something being right.  It made sense, I had always enjoyed my religion/theology classes, and had been fairly involved in a few different youth groups.  I made the switch and immediately noticed the difference, and not just in my grades.  This is what engages me, inspires me, and challenges me to grow.

We talked in the book study about the difference between a charism and a talent... Sherry Weddell tells us that "a charism is a "favor" or (in Thomas Aquinas's terminology) a "gratuitous grace" given to build up the Church and to witness Christ to the world" (pg.92).  But that was not terribly helpful in and of itself- we were still thinking in terms of "talent".  So we looked at a list of 'common' charisms: evangelism, encouragement, teaching, wisdom, healing, intercessory prayer, hospitality, administration, leadership, mercy, and giving to name a few.  Suddenly we understood the "favor" part, this is not something you inherit or can "develop" the same way you might a talent for art or sports, or music.  These are also things that are meant to "expand outward," they are for others. 

Sometimes charisms show themselves in situations in which they are needed, sometimes they manifest themselves gradually as a person's relationship with Christ deepens, but all of us have been given these gifts.  I want to encourage you to consider what your gifts, your charisms might be.  Think on the patterns of your life, the things people have said, even off-hand, and what you yourself notice.  Also, do not be afraid to affirm other's gifts- especially in the young. Sometimes hearing it can plant the seed to help that person grow in confidence to use the gifts they have been given.  Knowing your gifts, and being centered in the source of those gifts, can lead to an unimaginable sense of purpose, creativity and initiative.                              

Movie Review: "The Reluctant Saint"

I don't quite know why it took me so long to watch this, but this weekend I finally had the chance and was so glad I did.  This is a beautifully done movie, with a wonderful cast. 

Giuseppe is a young man who is full of life and love.  He is also somewhat clumsy and 'slow'- he has a very hard time learning and remembering things.  For this, he is teased and bullied and often finds himself in trouble that he did not necessarily cause.  I found it very difficult to watch how he was treated by children and adults in the town, his mother and even many of the friars at first.  It really bothered me until my husband helped me put it into some perspective.  This is why he is a saint, this is life- we are all saved by the Cross, and this was his Cross (or at least one of them).  In thinking about it, I realized too, that Giuseppe was a wonderful witness of today's Gospel. 

Jesus said to his disciples:
“You have heard that it was said,
An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil.
When someone strikes you on your right cheek,
turn the other one to him as well.
If anyone wants to go to law with you over your tunic,
hand him your cloak as well..."

Giuseppe was not a witness because he was perfect.  When things went wrong, often he tried to hide, but ultimately he did accept the consequences.  The one time he makes an attempt to defend himself, and chase away a friar who was harrassing him, as soon as he realized what he had done, he knelt and asked forgiveness.  And another time, when he realized this same friar had taken the bust of a broken statue of Mary that he loved, he snuck into the stable.  Whether he intended at first to take it back I don't know, but what he did was replace the bust to a more beautiful and prominent place in the stable.  Ultimately, he knew love and lived it out- and did his best to make it right if he fell short.

It is a bishop who finally sits and speaks with Giuseppe one night, and realizes the deep and simple love for God, and for the faith that Giuiseppe has.  The bishop also recognized in Giuseppe's care of the animals, the soul of a shepherd, a gift for caring for the lost and broken 'sheep' of the Church.  This bishop started Giuseppe on a journey that led him ultimately to the priesthood, a difficult journey of study, with some of the best help his order could provide, and in which nobody quite expected him to succeed, though many hoped for him. 

Finally, Giuseppe could never have realized his calling, or accomplished the work necessary without a community around him.  The friars supported him in his studies, encouraged him, and quietly helped him if he forgot some words in the Mass- the community embraced him with his weaknesses and his incredible gifts and in doing so helped open Giuseppe up to his own gifts, and all that God was calling him to. 

"We Don't Know What Normal Is"





  In Chapter 2, Sherry Weddell explores the relationship that develops in "normative Catholicism," which she calls three "journeys."  The first journey is the personal, interior journey of relationship with Christ, that results in an intentional decision to follow Him.
 
One of the things she points to as an obstacle in forming this personal relationship is a lack of proclamation of the story of Jesus.  It seems so simple... share the story... and it makes so much sense.  How can we follow someone we don't know?

Have you ever tried introducing someone you don't know- or don't know well?  Awkward and usually superficial right?  This is no casual relationship we are called to, and we must be absolutely convinced of it's importance in our life if we are to help others in their own encounter with Christ.  The reality is, if we do not have a personal relationship with Him, our connection with his Church loses meaning and is drastically weakened.

I want to share two experiences of coming to know Christ in the scripture.  The first is lectio divina, or divine reading.  Just practicing reading the same passage slowly, several times and taking time to journal about what I read- free-writing, really- I found that different words, phrases, and images stood out to me.  I also found that if was reading the same passage over the course of a week or more, different things would strike me.  What this showed me is that scripture is truly a living word- it still matters today- and I know it does because one of the first things I usually find myself doing if I take time to reflect, is thinking about things that are happening in my life.  In other words, it was an experience of there being "Someone" on the other end of the conversation.

The other experience is what I call a "personal reading" of scripture.  I have seen this in SPRED sessions, and basically it consists of the proclamation of a short Gospel passage, and then at the end, the catechist goes quietly to each member of the group, takes their hands gently, and gives a message from the Gospel, beginning "today Jesus says to you..."  Though it is the same message given to each person, it was incredibly powerful to experience the Gospel stated in such a personal way.  It is downright startling to hear the Gospel as a message TO YOU, but that is what it is.  Scripture is so alive that it is at once a word to the Church as a whole, and an intimately personal word to each of us.  In a group for children or adults with intellectual disabilities, ability and functioning vary widely, yet there was a prevailing sense of peace, and quiet, and receiving- a response simply of joy. 

Weddell makes a good point that often we are silent, even uncomfortable about talking about our relationship with Christ. I admit that I am. It is so much easier to talk doctrine than to say what Jesus means to me, particularly with those closest to me, and the more I avoid it the harder it gets.  So this is our challenge- to have the courage to let our enthusiasm shine, to be creative and engaged, ask questions and most of all, to know for ourselves and be ready to give "the reason for our joy."

I'll finish as Weddell finishes "We must be convinced that all the baptized...will eventually be called to make a personal choice to live as a disciple of Jesus Christ in the midst of his Church"

Writing this has called to mind this song - I'll present it today as encouragement in our climb up the mountain!

"Forming Intentional Disciples" and Special Needs

 

 

I am taking part in a weekly book club, reading Sherry Weddell's, Forming Intentional Disciples: The Path to Knowing and Following Jesus.  One of the basic premises is that there is a chasm named "discipleship" between the Church's teaching on the lay apostolate, and people's lived spiritual experience.  I decided to explore the implications of her work in ministry to people with special needs. 

Chapter 1: "God Has No Grandchildren"

 

Chapter One is a little difficult to sift through, and can be discouraging, as Weddell is laying out the grim reality that there seems to be a trickle of people joining the Church, and a hemorrhage of people leaving- either becoming unaffiliated, or joining a Protestant, or other Evangelical congregation.  There is a lot of data that she presents to explore the directions taken and the reasons why, but what most struck me is the hope she presents: there are many people who are "unaffiliated" who are seeking, and open to a religious identity.

At one point Weddell mentions that the 'traditional methods'- children's religious education, sacramental preparation, youth groups, and even Catholic schools do not seem to be effective in the transition through the child and teen years to a personal, adult faith. She points out that "It is the adult's spiritual journey- building upon his or her experience as a child and teenager- that is most likely to translate into a lifelong faith and consistent religious practice" (pg 35).

Our group noted that this is a very individual process, happening in the context of a community... and suggested that what we really need is an "individualized spiritual care plan." Not exactly practical when there is one pastor (sometimes for several parishes!) one youth minister or DRE etc... who are overseeing the faith formation of a parish. 

Yet,  as we talked, one of the common themes that emerged in the shaping of our own 'personal' experiences of faith was a person.  These were people who we saw being faithful in their everyday lives, praying with purpose, attending Mass, taking time for those around them, and keeping faith in the midst of suffering.  We were all drawn to the peace they seemed to have.  What I have realized is that in 'witnessing,' those people in my life were really giving me a model to follow and apply in my life, building the foundation for my own relationship with Christ and with His Church, showing me what love and trust look like. 

We all need this in the different stages of our lives.  We need this example in the roller-coaster ride of experiences our lives can take us on.  Having someone to be with, and to 'follow' provides stability and in stability we find resilience and the tenacity to continue on.  Of course we all know that people are not perfect, which is why we have to recognize that ultimately we are drawn to Christ, and following a model of loving, trusting and hoping in Someone who is bigger than our troubles, who is trustworthy, and who LOVES us first.

Any of us can be a witness.  This is not just the job of a pastor, or teacher, or parent, or youth minister.  Particularly in the case of a person with special needs, when your struggles may be much more apparent than others, so much more powerful can your witness of hope and trust and love be.