The Mystery of Being Human

Psalm 139:14

If you ever need to hear how immensely precious you are, read Psalm 139.  Just ponder for a moment the image- even better- the reality of someone who knows you so thoroughly and loves you so completely and unreservedly.

If we could view ourselves through the eyes of that Person... what would we see?  Would we WANT to see? And would we believe what we saw if we did?

We live in a society that has largely lost its sense of wonder at the unique and unrepeatable beauty of each person.  Consider this for a moment... we believe and we teach that EACH of us is created in the image and likeness of none other than GOD himself!!  Fashioned uniquely after His own likeness and heart, which we see in the flesh in Jesus of Nazareth.  Now THAT is something to wonder at!

Wonder... rapt attention or astonishment at something awesomely mysterious or new to one's experience. 

But we live out human existence day in and day out... and we have years of learning, which is why we smile knowingly, or perhaps don't even pay much attention when a child is so absolutely captivated by a shadow or a weed, which has just been presented as if it were a diamond.  It isn't anything new... is it?  

I think the key to wonder is that word "mystery".  A mystery, far from being some dark and sinister thing, simply means that there are things we cannot fully understand and so we cannot fully explain, which includes ourselves.  Walker Percy expresses this well, with his typical tongue in cheek:

"A stranger approaching you in the street will in a second's glance see you whole, size you up, place you in a way in which you cannot and never will, even though you have spent a lifetime with yourself..." (Lost in the Cosmos, pp. 7-8)

At a training the mother of a little girl who has Down Syndrome put it beautifully: a child is "like a gift that you carefully open over time, and allow him or her to reveal themselves." In this way, wonder respects the mysterious reality, not trying to fit it into an understandable box, or claiming to have all the answers, but simply gazing in astonishment.

Once we begin to do this, there is one thing we can be sure of: prepare to be surprised!  Those around us will do and say things we could never predict or expect- no matter how long or well we know him or her.  My mom shared a great example just the other day- she and my dad awoke in the morning to find that my sister had made herself cozy on the couch, with a blanket and a fresh Coke, and for the first time, had used the remote to turn on the TV. 

How many times have we heard stories of someone or other "beating the odds", or achieving something against all expectation. I wonder if perhaps our expectations are too low.  Perhaps we are too bound to the definitions, to what we see on the surface- to the diagnosis, and have forgotten that the person before us is in many respects an unknown with their own potential to be revealed and developed.  In this case, our work becomes to watch and learn, to nurture, and finally to simply gaze in astonishment at what flowers.

Each of us is wonderfully created, and the One who created us knows each step of our lives, each breath we take- each hair on our head.  He knows and loves us who are created in his image as he knows and loves Himself.  Maybe today we can begin to look on ourselves, and each other with fresh eyes- to see as He sees, and to appreciate anew the awesome mystery of each and every person and each and every day.

You formed my inmost being;

you knit me in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am wonderfully made;

wonderful are your works! 

My very self you know 

                                                             (Psalm 139:13-14)

Mom Says it Best... 5 Easy Steps to Reaching Out to Youth with Special Needs and their Families

I recently had the pleasure of taking part in a Pastoral In-Service for Youth Ministers and PAREs in the New Albany deanery.  The focus of this in-service was reaching out to youth with special needs and their families.

In the first part of the in-service I talked about autism, some of the gifts and challenges a youth minister or PARE might encounter, as well as some tips to help make it easier for these individuals to participate.  Lots of info, and truly, I hope it helped!

But then in the second half of the in-service, Anne stood up and began to share about her family's experience in the Church with her 25 year old son, who has Down Syndrome.  And she blew it all away.  It wasn't that we weren't saying essentially the same things... it was just that marvelous case of experience managing to cut through all the extra words and just expressing what is real.  And these are the five things she recommended to any parish to support these individuals and their families.

 

1. Invitation:
Many families are rather isolated, some have had bad experiences, others may not even imagine that active parish life is possible.  This is why the personal invitation is so so crucial- and it may take several invitations before they are ready!
Also, model welcoming and belonging!  She spoke of an experience when her son was an infant, at Christmas Mass when her pastor came, picked up her son and gave his homily with him happily sitting on his lap.    

2. Communication:
Open two way communication with parents or caregivers will ensure continuity and support for one another!

3. Collaboration:
Simply put, being open to possibilities and trying different things.  Even if the answer is "You know, I'm not sure.  Lets put our heads together and see what we can figure out to make this work."

4. Education:
Learn about different disabilities.  This will remove some of the mystery, and give tools to better support to those individuals.  

5. Flexibility:
Try and try again, and just know that it's OK if it's just a bad day, and that lesson is not going to get done.  And, she mentioned, that this is most definitely a two way street :-)