Reflections on An Advent Dialogue with the Sick

This weekend I had the joy of beginning Joseph Ratzinger/Pope Emeritus XVI's short book The Blessing of Christmas.  The first part of this book is An Advent Dialogue with the Sick.  There is such a great wisdom and love in his words that just lifted my heart, so I wanted to share some of it with you.

First, though Benedict XVI is speaking to those who are sick, I found myself thinking of all the ways we can be isolated during this time- those who, like my husband and myself, are far from their families, those who are new to the area and have not built up a community of friends, who are in group homes or care facilities, those who work long or odd hours or solitary work, or who struggle with seasonal depression to name a few.  All of these things can prevent people from being able to share in the joy others feel at this time of the year.  In fact, in one way or another, I would imagine this is something we can all relate to, and he presents Advent as "a medicine for the soul that makes it easier to bear the enforced inaction and the pain of your illness. Advent can help us discover the unobtrusive grace that can lie in the very fact of being sick." [or isolated]

The word "Advent" (adventus in Latin) can actually be translated as "presence" or "arrival" (cf Ratzinger).  Typically that is not the first thing we think of: we think first of the waiting, or anticipation of the arrival.  This lends to a different focus- the word is intended to show in a very real way God's presence and closeness, his love- and the blessing he brings in his presence.  Benedict tells us, "in general terms, when they used this word, they intended to say God is here. He has not withdrawn from the world. He has not left us alone. Although we cannot see him and take hold of him as we do with objects in this world, nevertheless he is here, and he comes to us in many ways."

 

Roger van der Weyden The Visitation



When we are sick, isolated or lonely, we are taken out of the rush and routine of typical daily life, where there is little time- and frankly often little encouragement to reflect and make conscious and intentional choices in our external activity and inner life.  Benedict tells us "When I am sick I am obliged to be still.  I am obliged to wait.  I am obliged to reflect on myself; I am obliged to bear being alone.  I am obliged to bear pain, and I am obliged to accept the burden of my own self. All this is hard."  Yet, this is where the time of Advent can be especially full of blessing and meaning, especially for those who are sick, or who are feeling lonely or isolated for any reason.  Essentially what we are talking about is a visit- a visit from one who knows us and loves us more deeply than we can imagine, and who desires to come to us personally. 

 

In this sense, this time, difficult as it really is, can be seen as an opportunity, and Benedict challenges us to see it this way: "The Lord has interrupted my activity for a time in order to let me be still."  He proposes that it is in the stillness that God is waiting for us, and not only that but USING it.  He says, "we rebel against it, this is not only because it is painful or because it is hard to be still and alone: we rebel against it because there are so many important things we ought to be doing and because illness seems meaningless. But it is not in the least meaningless! In the structure of human life as a whole, it is profoundly meaningful. It can be a moment in our life that belongs to God, a time when we are open to him and thus learn to rediscover our own selves."  [my emphasis]

Myself, I begin to imagine the possibilities for someone who has a long-term illness, or who perhaps has more solitary work, or who has yet to build a community.  I have been inspired by the examples of the saints, and the stories of those who strive still, such as that of Kara Tippets (check out her blog at http://mundanefaithfulness.com/).  Benedict poses this question... "If I learn to accept myself in these days of stillness, if I accept the pain, because the Lord is using it to purify me- does this not make me richer than if I had earned a lot of money? Has not something happened to me that is more durable and fruitful than all those things that can be counted and calculated?  I hope I can remind myself of this when I'm fretting because I'm home by myself for a few hours on a Saturday morning because my husband is proctoring a test, or when I wake up at 2:45 am with back pain.  It is a moment, an opportunity I have been given, and He is there, waiting. 

I won't say this is true in every case, but often I have noticed that when a person is chronically ill, or feeling lonely and isolated, small gains, good days, little gestures of genuine friendship, become a beacon of light, and a moment to celebrate.  These memories also remain, and they have the ability to sustain us in the hard days when we are not feeling consolation.  They remind us of the truth that we are loved, that we are not really alone, and that there is good.   

 

Benedict ends with a great challenge, and a reminder:
"Perhaps we should try an experiment.  Let us understand the individual events of the day as little signs God sends us.  Let us not take note only of the annoying and unpleasant things; we should endeavor to see how often God lets us feel something of his love.  To keep a kind of inner diary of good things would be a beautiful and healing task. 
The Lord is here.  This Christian certainty is meant to help us look at the world with new eyes and to understand the "visitation" as a visit, as one way in which he can come to us and be close to us."

**If you are interested in reading the book yourself, here is a link: http://www.amazon.com/Blessing-Christmas-Joseph-Cardinal-Ratzinger-ebook/dp/B003UNLARG


Advent: A Sensory Heaven

I love this time of year... there is such an air of anticipation, light, music, decoration; it is just a feast for the senses!  This makes it a particularly good and easy time to share the story, and point out some ways to use things many of us are already using and doing to share the experience with those who have special needs...

 

The Wreath:

  There is SO much teaching you can do with your Advent wreath! Starting with the colors of the candles, purple for Jesus's kingship, and repentance for our sins, and rose for joy. Some like to focus on a theme for each week: though none are required, typically you will see themes of Hope, Peace, Joy and Love. With the shape and if it is made of evergreens- you've got a nice little reminder of the eternal life we hope for.

 

 Creche:

  There is not a much more visual (and tactile) way to keep our hearts in the reason for this season, tell the story of the Incarnation, and also teach about the preparation and anticipation that by using a beautiful creche.  There are a couple of ways you can do this, I have seen people put pieces out one by one, over the course of the month, or have it all out, but wait until Christmas to place baby Jesus in the manger with a prayer.  Some have their Wise Men travel around the room, arriving at the creche on the Epiphany- which is also a good way to emphasize not only our own journey to Jesus, but also that Christmas is a season, and not just a single day :-)  If you are able, it is worth investing in a creche that can be safely manipulated, but does not look like a toy.  You will be amazed at the story telling and arranging you see. 

 

 

Advent Calendar:

There are many different kinds of Advent calendar, which is wonderful because you can find one that best suits your needs.  There are some calendars like this that are more visually based: each compartment contains a magnetic figure to add to the scene in the middle, which allows you to introduce and talk about each person, animal or object one at a time.  Then, throughout the month we slowly see the picture emerge, which again, is an opportunity to talk about preparing and

anticipation. 

A calendar like this one could almost act as a simplified Jesse Tree, but requires a little more reading and focus than the one above.  For each day there is a small booklet, which can then be hung on a tree as an ornament.  In each booklet is a bible story, a song, or a prayer which can be read, sung or prayed together.  The stories are simply, but well written, and so are very easy to follow and read aloud.  I will say this, having used this calender in a classroom setting: this one can be difficult to use in a large group, if they are one that needs or will push to see the pictures right away, only because the booklets are very small.  I can also attest to the fact that it is durable! :-)   

 

 

Of course you do not have to buy an Advent Calendar... a perennial favorite is the Advent Chain- this was made clear by the absolute joy my religious ed class had this past weekend creating a chain to help decorate the children's activity area for our festival! One really nice thing about this is how personal it is, plus you can also make action oriented, and colored according to the weeks of Advent, Christmas colors, or many colors if you choose! One neat tradition I have seen with this chain is to include some some small action for each day, it could be service oriented, spiritually/prayer oriented, and also include a few things for enjoyment (like make hot chocolate and read a book with someone or take a walk to look at Christmas lights.)

 

Music:

Music has power to evoke emotion and tell a story, with or without words.  That said, does it sometimes seem like "O Come O Come Emmanuel" (beautiful and rich as it truly is) is about the only Advent song in existence?  This is one album that brought some beautiful, different and surprising songs to my attention.  I highly recommend supporting the Sisters and purchasing the CD, but if you just need one song, or want to listen first, pretty much the whole album is on YouTube.  These songs convey a quiet beauty, stillness and longing that complements any Advent prayer time or lesson.   

 

Also, especially considering some of the feast days we celebrate in December, you can never go wrong with a Marian hymn or song- have you heard this one?

You can even find some surprises on what seems to be a secular Christmas album! (Gotta put a plug in for this one too- but won't spoil it, check it out on YouTube, and I am guessing if you don't know Pink Martini it might take a little getting used to, but will quickly become part of your Christmas-time repertoire)

OK, OK, no more song videos... on to the final part I'll mention today: a Jesse Tree.
The Jesse Tree is named as you probably guessed, for King David's father.  It is basically a way to trace salvation history (and the lineage of Jesus) visually and scripturally, and beginning on December 17th, with the O Antiphons, the anticipation intensifies, and we examine some attributes of Jesus (i.e wisdom of God, key of David...).  Again, this is a wonderfully visual way to explore salvation history- it is scripturally rooted, but naturally breaks the story into "bite sized pieces".  Each day a (usually pretty short) Scripture passage is read, and the ornament with the corresponding symbol is hung on a bare tree (branch).  You can take as much or as little time as you have to explore the symbols, but it is pretty much guaranteed the ones you do this with will remember the story :-)  There are many ways to make these ornaments, this is the pattern I followed:  http://healthy-family.org/free-jesse-tree-advent-patterns/ but if you are feeling crafty, this will at least tell you the symbols to include, and scripture passages :-)
 

Next week we'll talk about some good books to share during this time! 

It's Been Awhile! Review of "Produce: Where Hope Grows"

 

In honor of Down Syndrome Awareness Month, I thought it would be a good time to bring attention again, to a certain upcoming movie.  "Produce" is actually not scheduled to come out until next year, but screenings were scheduled at the Down Syndrome Convention (with the star present, no less!) and I was able to see it there.  It is one of those movies that could very easily get 'passed by' in the theater line-up, but it brings a powerful message, and is one that shouldn't be missed if you have the opportunity.  Now, since it isn't out yet, I don't want to be a spoiler, BUT it is important to know a little about the story.

 

Produce follows the very unlikely friendship of Calvin and Produce.  Calvin is a former professional baseball player in a small Kentucky town.  His career ended when he suffered a panic attack at the plate, and since then has basically been 'skating by' in life, and in his relationship with his daughter, using alcohol to self-medicate.  That begins to change on the day he met a young man named Produce, working in the produce department at the local grocery store.  Produce has Down Syndrome.  With his upbeat attitude, persistent presence, conversation,questions and invitations, Calvin slowly begins to respond, and the two form a friendship. 

 

This friendship slowly begins to affect other parts of both Calvin and Produce's lives. The openness that Produce shares with Calvin trickles into Calvin's relationship with his daughter.  Calvin in turn with his stronger personality, supports Produce in his goals, and things he wants to learn, and in demanding respect from others.  Produce in his transparency, challenges Calvin in his fears, faith and the choices he makes, and ultimately Calvin and his daughter offer a friendship that really becomes more like a family.

 

I will be completely honest.  This movie will not blow you away by it's cinematography or writing.  It is a homegrown, grassroots labor of love.  What will without a doubt leave an impression is the obvious care with which it is done, and the heart of this story: the characters you come to know, the friendship that grows and sows life and hope in the lives of many others. It is also a strong affirmation of the dignity of each person, regardless of their ability- to see each person as a person, with their own story, strengths and weaknesses.   

 

So, in conclusion, keep your eyes open for this movie to come out in 2015, and see it if you are able!  You can follow their news at their website: www.iamproduce.com and on their Facebook page: "Produce: Where Hope Grows"  

 

          

The Function of Dysfunctional Behavior

 

 

Screaming, (excessive) crying, physical or verbal aggression, not following directions, running or climbing inside, interrupting, and yes, inappropriate language and undressing.  Have you thought of someone you know yet?  These behaviors can be disruptive, add tension and 'electricity' to any environment, and frankly, could probably test the patience of a saint.

 

I remember a horrible tantrum I was faced with in my second year of teaching- screaming, crying, kicking, the whole nine yards.  I was getting emotionally charged myself, and extremely frustrated.  Finally, almost in desperation, I asked him "what's going on... is there something you need?" Shuddering breath and tears, then "I'm hungry". After catching my breath, and marveling for a moment at what had just happened, I took him by the hand to help him up, and got him a snack. Afterward, all I could do was remind him to tell me when he was feeling hungry.   

 

I wanted to share a few helpful things I've learned along the way for approaching behaviors like these.  A helpful place to start is to distinguish the type of behavior you are observing: a "behavioral excess" like aggression, screaming or crying, a "behavioral deficit" (lack of skills) like communication, or academics, or directions or "inappropriate impulse control" like running inside, climbing on furniture or interrupting (cf. Stacy Taylor, MA, BCBS).   

 

Behavior has a purpose.  Behavior produces consequences.  There is a reason the person is engaging in the behavior, and they have continued to do it because IT WORKS.  It is communicating something that the person perhaps doesn't have the language or social skills to express appropriately. So the most important question to ask is "why".  Are they seeking attention, avoidance, access to some reinforcer, or to some sensory or physical need? 

 

SO, the first action is to make sure that any physical needs (sleep, food, water, bathroom, temperature), are met.  Also, consider any potential medical issues, like pain, sensory issues (including hearing and vision), stomach issues, or even PMS.

 

 

The consequences of the behavior either reinforce and strengthen it, or will weaken the behavior, so our reactions are very important in reinforcing the behavior we want to see, and building and keeping a good relationship based in trust. 

 

1st: Be specific as to what the behavior expectations are- and model it! 
Some people do need more modeling and help to know and do what is appropriate.
 

2nd: Be consistent.
Calm language and consequences that are consistent with your expectations takes time and practice, but they are crucial for building trust, avoiding power struggles and to de-escalate.
 

3rd: Focus on reinforcing positive behaviors, and positive consequences.    

 

Put Behavior In Context

Particularly if there is a recurring behavior, take a record of four things:

• what the setting was (where, what time of day, who... etc.),
• what occurred immediately before the behavior,
•  an objective description of what the behaviors are, and
• what happened immediately after the behavior

 Knowing the setting and what happened before can help you make changes to prevent behaviors.  An objective description of the behavior helps to target specific behaviors/skills to teach, as well as appropriate behavior to reinforce.  The final step is to develop a plan of consequences for when a problem behavior occurs, and when the desired behavior occurs.  This step can take some trial and error, and input from the person and their parents, or previous teachers/care-takers on strategies and motivators can be invaluable.   


Finally, it is worth taking a few seconds to calm yourself before responding to a problem behavior or conflict.  If you jump into an emotionally charged situation without being calm, most likely what will happen is that "gasoline will be added to a fire" and not only will you not respond the way you want to, but it will escalate the situation.  So, again, it is worth taking a few seconds to breathe deeply (even if it is just as you are walking over to the situation), say a quick prayer- and even self-talk if you need to "I am ok, I am safe, I can do this" but especially breathe.  The moment to calm keeps blood and oxygen to your brain instead of your muscles (for flight or fight), so you can stay in an executive state of mind, and ready to respond and problem solve.  
Hope this helps!

Making Prayer a Sensory Experience...

"For me, prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy" St. Therese of Lisieux

The most beautiful thing about prayer is that it can be so incarnational- using our bodies, our senses, and of course concrete sacramentals to aid us in our response to God, who lovingly reaches out to us.  This is especially important in working with people with special needs, including ADD-ADHD and ASD, for whom repetition, movement, visuals and tactile experiences are such an important part of how they learn best.  So here are some things that can help especially bring out this sensory, incarnational aspect of prayer...

To get started, it's always easiest to begin with things that are usually present anyway.

Dim lights and Candle Light: we all know how mesmerizing candle light is.  This is a very easy way to encourage an atmosphere of the sacred and to direct attention and focus.  It is also HIGHLY symbolic of the presence, light and knowledge of Jesus.  Artificial candles do not give the same effect, and so, with safety precautions taken, real candles are best. 

Beads: There is something deliberately meditative and soothing about the movement of running your fingers over beads.  Beads have been used in prayer for centuries, and in many different religious traditions.  The Rosary and Divine Mercy Chaplet can be said using the same beads- and by the way, usually include other visual reminders which can be mini lessons- namely a crucifix and a medal.  The Divine Mercy Chaplet also has the beautiful image of Jesus to meditate on as one prays.  There are lots of methods for making a full rosary, or decade string, which is not only a good way to talk about how to pray the rosary or chaplet, but also personalizes it, and can then be blessed.  Here are a couple!  

How To Make Knotted Cord Rosaries
How to Make Sacrifice Beads/Rosary Decade

The Stations of the Cross: This can be found in every Church.  Not only is there a visual for each station, but movement from station to station, to 'travel' along the journey with Jesus.  Outdoor/walking Stations are also powerful in that space allows for larger, sometimes more tactile images to reflect on.  

Music: having chant, taize, or other meditative music playing softly, or available on headphones is soothing, encourages the atmosphere of the sacred, and personal meditation and prayer.



Sacred Art: We are blessed with a rich tradition of icons, statues and paintings.  Paintings are wonderful ways to communicate a story without words.  Icons are rich in symbolism and doctrine, as they are meant to be a "window to heaven" truly making present the person or event depicted.

 

Statues, especially figures that might later be gently handled, are also wonderful sensory additions to prayer, as they remind us of the presence and intercession of those who have gone before, the communion of the faithful, which also includes those in Purgatory and in Heaven.  One example is these small statues from Joseph's Studio (and carried by many Catholic book/gift shops) are beautiful, and made of resin, so they can safely be handled.  (On a side note, they also distribute the Fontanini nativity pieces, which are made of the same material.)   

http://www.roman.com/products.php?line=josephs-gifts-renaissance-general

 

Art Supplies! Some really do think, focus and express themselves better in pictures- their mind works in images, and having art supplies like paint, markers, available really is the best way to evoke a personal prayer.

 

Incense: this might be something for people to get used to, but there is wonderful tradition here,  recognizing something that is holy, of our own prayers and small acts ascending to God, as well as a pleasing smell.  This also tends toward an atmosphere of the sacred.  

 

Prayer Sensory Bins:

might include sand, water or oil, and/or or other applicable objects smooth rocks, shells, objects which invite touching, along with a scripture passage or picture to look at to lend toward making connections, relaxation, and meditation.  

 

Hopefully this gave you some ideas, and got the juices flowing... what other sensory experiences have been helpful in your prayer? 



Suicide Prevention Week

September 10th is World Suicide Prevention Day, which (at least in the US) is encompassed by National Suicide Prevention Week.  It seemed appropriate to take a look at some of the causes and contributing factors in suicide.

In North America one of the leading causes of suicide is mental illness, in particular depression.  The greatest thing we can do to help in this area is raise awareness of mental illness.  This can be done with short articles inserted into the bulletin and on the parish website, by prayer intentions, and in homilies (I'll link to some resources for all of these at the end).  The fact is, mental illness is widely prevalent- just think of anxiety and depression in their different levels and forms alone.  It is so prevalent, and yet there is still a stigma (bias, distrust, stereotyping, fear, embarrassment, anger, and/or avoidance) attached to mental illness which keeps people from talking about what is going on, and from seeking help.  Education can help immeasurably with this, but another thing to keep in mind is the way we speak- our jokes and comments- and the less overt things which can 'stigmatize' and isolate people, such as lower expectations, avoidance, and fear. 

Alcohol and substance abuse are also contributing factors- especially when paired with another mental illness.

Other contributing factors are changes, loss and beginnings.  Changes can include moving, a new school or work, major life events (marriage, purchasing a home, pregnancy), and even seasonal changes.  Loss can be a large contributing factor- loss of a loved one, loss of a job/long unemployment, and recent disability. Beginnings can be a factor as well- the beginning of the school year, beginning of the week etc, as they bring added stress and expectations.
Being aware of these kinds of things can do a lot to help a person who is struggling.  Giving them time and opportunities to talk it out, and probably most importantly not attaching a particular time line to when that person should be 'readjusted' particularly when it comes to grief.

The final factor I'll mention today is isolation.  Whether it is because of stigma (real or perceived) or because of difficult behaviors, symptoms or fear, it is very easy for people who have a mental illness to be either completely silent about what is happening, to avoid reaching out to others, and/or to be avoided.  Feeling alone only compounds feelings of helplessness.  This is where peer relationships can be so healing.  Peers are people who have a mental illness themselves (or have a family member who does), people of a similar age and background, or really anyone with whom the person has formed a supportive relationship.  Parishes are a natural place where people can connect this way, by invitation to regular parish activities, or even by sponsoring a specific opportunity for people who have a mental illness to meet and get together.           

One last thing to remember: behaviors are a language all their own, speaking of what is happening internally even if it cannot be verbalized.  If you notice changes- erratic behavior, wide mood swings, or someone becoming atypically moody and withdrawn, sleeping more, neglecting responsibilities, losing interest in friends and activities they once loved or beginning to neglect their appearance, health, and hygiene- these are things to be concerned about and to ask about.

And of course, in a crisis, the Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also available 24/7: 1.800.273.TALK (8255) or 911.   

Sample Short Bulletin Articles
Sample Prayer Intentions
Homily Preparation Tips

Inclusion in the Liturgy...

"Persons with disabilities... seek to serve the community and to enjoy their full baptismal rights as members of the Church" (PS 33)

A question was brought to my attention the other day, and I realized that this person may not be the only one wondering!  The question was essentially, "Are there guidelines for persons with disabilities participating in liturgical ministries?" 

The short answer is, not specifically.  Participation of persons with special needs in pastoral ministry to the fullest extent possible is the goal and a strong 'ought' given to parishes by the US bishops.  Beyond that, the guidelines are essentially the same for persons with disabilities as they are for any lay person. 

To give a more "official" [read longer] answer , I looked to the US Bishops Guidelines for Celebration of Sacraments with Persons with Disabilities (CS), as well as the Pastoral Statement on Persons with Disabilities (PS).  I also looked into Christifideles Laici (CL), the document by Pope St. John Paul II, which resulted from the synod of Bishops on the vocation and mission of laity in the Church and the world, and even a little canon law.     

I'll begin with some of the Bishop's thoughts on inclusion in liturgical celebrations in general:

"It is essential that all forms of the liturgy be completely accessible to persons with disabilities, since these forms are the essence of the spiritual tie that binds the Christian community together." (CS Introduction)

Keep in mind, the bishops are not talking specifically about liturgical ministries at this point, but about the accessibility of the liturgy itself.  In this regard, the wording as it continues is quite strong:

"To exclude members of the parish from these celebrations of the life of the Church, even by passive omission, is to deny the reality of that community." 

Wow. 
They go on to acknowledge inconsistencies which have arisen, and are still being faced- including the availability of sign language interpreters and the general physical accessibility of buildings.  Much of the basis for these inconsistencies is not what you might think, and the bishops address that too:

"[Inconsistencies] arise from an uncertainty about the appropriate application of Church law towards persons with disabilities. Others are born out of fear or misunderstanding. Still others are the result of a studied and honest acceptance of the realistic limitations of a parish's or diocese's available resources." (CS Preface)

Here the Bishops actually do make a recommendation, that in the case of limited resources, a parish might pair up with a neighboring parish or parishes to provide what is needed.

"parishes should encourage persons with disabilities to participate in all levels of pastoral ministry (e.g., as care ministers, catechists, etc.)." (CS general Principals #5) 

Now we get to it.  Short and sweet.  And here is another:

"Parish sacramental celebrations should be accessible to persons with disabilities and open to their full, active and conscious participation, according to their capacity"
(CS #3) 

The phrase I am looking at in particular here is "according to their capacity."

Now for a little bit of law... before I do though, a caveat: I do not profess to be a canon lawyer, so I will keep my commentary to a minimum and primarily clarifying.  Also, this is not an exhaustive list-  I wanted to point out a few canons that seemed pertinent and apply, I might add, to ALL laity, not just persons with disabilities.

Can. 228 §1. Lay persons who are found suitable are qualified to be admitted by the sacred pastors to those ecclesiastical offices and functions which they are able to exercise according to the precepts of the law.
 [any lay person who is found suitable (proper/appropriate) by the priest is qualified to be admitted to the Church offices and service allowed them by canon law]  

Can. 230 §1. Lay men who possess the age and qualifications established by decree of the conference of bishops can be admitted on a stable basis through the prescribed liturgical rite to the ministries of lector and acolyte.
[Lay men who are old enough, and meet the prescribed qualifications may be admitted to the stable (permanent) ministries of lector and acolyte (service on the altar)]
                       click HERE for more information on the qualifications.
 

§2. Lay persons can fulfill the function of lector in liturgical actions by temporary designation. All lay persons can also perform the functions of commentator or cantor, or other functions, according to the norm of law.
[just want to note a couple of distinctions here: a lay man or woman can act as lector on a temporary basis- it does not have the same binding nature of a permanent ministry]
 

§3. When the need of the Church warrants it and ministers are lacking, lay persons, even if they are not lectors or acolytes, can also supply certain of their duties, namely, to exercise the ministry of the word, to preside over liturgical prayers, to confer baptism, and to distribute Holy Communion, according to the prescripts of the law.        [emphasis added]

Can. 231 §1. Lay persons who permanently or temporarily devote themselves to special service of the Church are obliged to acquire the appropriate formation required to fulfill their function properly and to carry out this function conscientiously, eagerly, and diligently.

[a long way to say, you must receive training for any liturgical service you take part in]

 

Ok, you still with me?  I want to return to Canon 228 for part of our answer.  Read it again, and note who admits a person to a liturgical service.  At the parish level it is the priest.  So, the clearest way to view participation in liturgical ministries is as a service provided by the laity when need warrants it, and at the discretion of the pastor. 

 

That being said, questions and tough calls do arise.  So should something come up, my best advice is to first speak with your pastor, calmly expressing your concern(s) and also listening with openness.  This can be a key moment for building a relationship!  

Welcomed: A Starting Place for Ministry to and with People with Special Needs

"We love the church and genuinely want to serve and be a part of it... We need the church. We need the body of Christ. We need our children to have a place at the table."

These words come from the mother of a boy who has a fairly severe sensory disorder, which makes it, literally, a painful experience to go to church.  Judging by the response her post received, it is clear that they reflect the feelings of many, many others. 

One of the first, and most important things we can do is to let these people and their families know that they are known, welcome in the Church, and that they are not alone.  Just to have the desire to include and serve these families and their loved ones is a message of hope.  These people and their families are called no less to be fully part of the Church and to participate actively in her work.  Once begun, it soon becomes clear that far from being simply an object of service and charity, there is a person who has an immense wealth to share and teach.

“… the bearer of a handicap is not simply an object of the Church’s love and service, but active and responsible participants in the work of evangelization and salvation.”

•Christifideles Laici 54

I am a firm believer that pictures speak 1000 words, and our most recent Popes have witnessed beautifully to this welcome and gift:  

“You are not alone, separated, abandoned or useless. You have been called by Christ and are his living and transparent image”  - World Day for the Sick 2013

 

“spread a culture of encounter, solidarity and hospitality towards persons with disabilities, not just asking for the proper social services but also encouraging their active participation in society.”

- Wednesday Audience June 11, 2013

 

"In the light of Christ's death and resurrection illness no longer appears as an exclusively negative event; rather, it is seen as a "visit by God", an opportunity "to release love, in order to give birth to works of love towards neighbour, in order to transform the whole of human civilization into a civilization of love"                                                               (Apostolic Letter Salvifici doloris, n. 30).

 

 

Pope St. John Paul II was a witness to his own words, being present and visible in his struggles, work and prayer, forgiving his attacker while in recovery from an assassination attempt and finally as his own body was giving way to illness.

Embracing the child within: openness and freedom

Some of the most 'open' people you'll ever meet are children and people with special needs.  There is a sense of transparency and willingness to experience and do and learn that most of us lose, at least to some extent. Why is that? 





Part of the reason is that most of us build up defenses of cynicism and antagonism, to protect those parts of us which we feel to be vulnerable.  For some, unfortunately, this comes from experience.  For others it even might come from education, among other things.

What do we have to fear that we are building defenses against?  The first thing that comes to mind is being hurt.  If you open yourself to someone, there always seems to be the possibility that trust could be betrayed.  Unfortunately that can and has happened all too often.  On a deeper level, if we are open, vulnerable in that way, it means we also have to be open to change- change in our perspective, our thoughts and words and actions- the very way we live.  The word here might be "conversion" or metanoia, which simply means turning (usually from something) toward God.  In relation to God, and opening ourselves to Jesus, maybe we are also as Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI suggests, "afraid He might take something away from us..." (cf. Weddell 157).  This is scary, it is dangerous and feels out of our control.

Yet, there is an amazing freedom in the lack of inhibition you will find so often in children and many people with special needs.  At our dinner dance, all we have to do is turn on the music and there is a full dance floor.  There are the ones who will wear just what they want- and they rock it!You may hear some uncomfortable- and sometimes funny truths and questions, and you WILL know what they are feeling (even if the 'why' takes a little bit of digging to uncover).

 



When you are dependent on others, you are vulnerable in a way many of us don't experience until we are older.  This takes trust.  When a person LIVES in vulnerability that way, I have also noticed a tendency to be more open, understanding and compassionate to others.  When you live your life (at times very acutely) aware of your own weaknesses, that awareness can translate into a quicker understanding of those of others.

I imagine this is at least part of the "child-like" spirit we are meant to embrace.  Sherry Weddell presents some great ways for us all to help foster openness (cf. p. 163):
-  practice non-judgmental truthfulness
-  ask thought-provoking questions
-  help connect the dots:
   in the person's own words as much as possible, help them see God's work in their lives
- ask God for help, or even a sign
- pray for openness
- pray, acknowledging openness   

It's Time For... Another Movie Review! "The Crash Reel"

I was privileged to hear Kevin Pearce, along with two of his brothers, David and Adam, speak at the National Down Syndrome Convention about two weeks ago.  We were 'teased' with a clip from this documentary film, and I finally got around to seeing the rest of it. 

Wow.  This is... not an easy film to watch, and mostly because it is very honest, and very real.  You travel the journey along with Kevin, his family and his friends, and you will witness the sometimes extreme life of 'extreme' athletes.  The documentary does explore the levels to which these sports are going, with increasingly complex tricks, on higher pipes, which mean more air, but also worse falls, as well as the issue of health insurance- which often does not cover what these athletes do.   

At age 18, Kevin Pearce seemingly popped up out of nowhere, and began winning all kinds of competitions, and was for all intents and purposes the only real rival for Shaun White on the snowboard.  Within four years, they were both preparing for the Vancouver Winter Olympics, when came a fateful practice on a pipe in Utah, less than 60 days before.

The accident (yes, it was captured on video)- compared to some others you will see through the course of the documentary actually doesn't LOOK too terrible, though the results were a catastrophic traumatic brain injury (TBI).

Afterward, there is a lot of healing and readjustment that has to take place, not the least of which was six months in the hospital, and this is the part that I found captivating.  In many ways, looking at Kevin and hearing him speak, you would not know the long road he has traveled in recovery.  And he wanted nothing more than to snowboard again.  This despite doctor's dire warnings against hitting his head again, and the worries expressed by his family,and probably no one more than his older brother David, who has Down Syndrome.

Kevin's journey to realizing and accepting his new limitations is a long road, and it took many 'puzzle pieces' coming together, such as trying a small jump on a snowboard and being unable to make it, meeting someone else who had multiple brain injuries, and finally, the death of a pipe skier at the same place he had his accident.  All of these things forced him to look at his new reality, to see what his strengths still are, and work towards a new goal and purpose.  There is a wonderful parallel made at one point, between Kevin's accepting his new reality and limitations, and his brother David finally trying to accept the reality that he has Down Syndrome. 

Ultimately, that purpose materialized in a foundation called "Love Your Brain".  LoveYourBrain is "the message that embodies our positive approach to brain injury prevention and recovery. Everything we do is about connecting, educating and empowering people to promote a brain healthy lifestyle." 

173,000+  people treated for a TBI each year are 19 years old or younger, and there is a growing awareness of concussions among student athletes.  Kevin's story, and that of his family, is a great one to share to talk about this issue, and experience it in a very vivid way. 



 

   

Movie Clips... The New Parable?

Jesus often used parables, stories to give the people who were listening an understandable context for what he was trying to teach.  He used familiar ideas and relationships- farming and fishing, crops, inheritance, family and even an unfriendly relationship with the Samaritans, to share his message.  The interesting thing is, what most often resulted was confusion, unease, and at times anger.  Jesus rarely explained his parables, and often if asked he responded with a question or... another parable.      

I would like to present videos, or movie clips as a way to do the same thing in a catechetical setting.  What are movies but visual stories?  Like Jesus' parables they tell their stories in familiar places and situations and in the midst of familiar relationships.  Movies can take us into history, or even beyond our own world into the most fantastical places.  They have also presented visually some of the best that fiction has to offer.  They are a rich tool particularly for many with special needs in their ability to 'illustrate' ideas and stories.  I used this one to be able to give my kids in sacramental prep a glimpse of the Last Supper, and to make some of the connections to what they see and hear at Mass.

Videos and movie clips can also be very thought provoking, particularly if preceded and/or followed by some prayer time, and a good discussion starter.  Tough issues can be more easily brought up if you are talking about a character.  Here's one to begin a conversation about salvation history, or sin and grace, and...??   
     

Also, do not underestimate the power of Disney- I would even say in particular Pixar.  Their movies have had some beautiful affirmations of community, marriage and family, and individual gifts- just to name a couple of things (come on, you probably teared up during the opening 15 minutes or so of 'UP" too)   

 
I would not suggest showing a 60 or even 30 minute segment of a movie- that does not allow for much if any lesson, or good discussion, and is not a good use of already limited time.  3-5 minutes is a good time to aim for and is usually long enough to get the point across.  

This means that any clip we show must be carefully chosen, with a few questions in mind: 

1.  Is is appropriate for the audience?

2.  Does it clearly illustrate the message or story it is intended?

3. OR, can it be used to spark/fuel discussion on the intended topic? 

A couple things to note: first, be aware that if you show a clip from a movie some may want to go and watch it all.  A great clip from a questionable movie might not be worth it.  So it is always a good idea to be aware of and follow viewer guidelines and policies for parental permission/notification. 

You can find a wealth of videos and clips on YouTube  another good place to look for movie clips is WingClips

What are some of your favorites??